Blogs by Hoorix

Middle school’s biggest scam: student council. But not the executive type, the boring stuff. Middle school student council is just a title for unpaid labor. And it’s not even exciting! Poor middle schoolers don’t even get flex privileges for their “respectable posts”! Look, don’t get me wrong, I know for some people student council is an HONOUR. Something they LONG for. But, fortunately or unfortunately, I’m not one of those people. To me, the student council just seems like a team of workers who do stuff for the rest of the class and teachers for free. UNPAID LABOR. The Selection Process (a.k.a. Pointless Report Card Logic) Our school just selects prefects by grades. The highest achiever just becomes the prefect by default. No observing behavior, no checking if the kid’s responsible, just pointless selection. Seriously, what does my report card have to do with my ability to “control” and “discipline” my classmates? Because obviously, if you know what mitochondria are, you must also kn...

The EIC Rule in a Nutshell! The most HILARIOUS thing is when history is unhinged. I mean, why aren't history textbooks written by Gen Z? Anyway, here’s my attempt to make history sound more dramatic and messed-up than it already is. Buckle up! So picture this: a rich group of businessmen with ships, asking the Queen, "Can we go to India, trade stuff, and get super rich?" (The queen said yes.) So, a bunch of British traders showed up in India, all polite with their “we just want to buy some spices and textiles” energy. Cute, right? But don’t be fooled. These guys weren’t here to shop, they were here to shoplift with style .  So, in the beginning, these dudes stayed sweet and humble. Complimenting Mughal rulers like snake friends, “OMG Jahangirrrrr!!!! I ABSOLUTELY LOVE the cutesy poem you wrote!!” And Jahangir, the stupid popular girl who thinks she has friends, allowed the EIC to build their factories and forts. Fast forward to when Aurangzeb got weak, and kingdoms starte...

Oh the horror! Being expressive in class, then being called out by the teacher for “disruptive behavior”. Lady, just straight up call me an untamed dog at this point. Save me the indirect insult.  As you can imagine, someone who suffers with Yappititis is completely helpless when it comes to shutting up. This obviously means I’m blabbering through lunch, english, math, science, history—you name it! If the teachers are on medication for severe headaches, I am probably the one to blame.  But nothing is more terrifying than being told to “behave myself” and “keep quiet”. Like, excuse me, miss, are you trying to DIM MY LIGHT?! The audacity. On a serious note, it is a gut-twisting feeling when the teachers tell me to silence in front of the whole class. It’s just so embarrassing to be called out for simply being yourself. I don’t see the teacher yelling at the mute girl in the back for “disrupting” class with her quietness. It’s disrespectful and misbehaving when I’m embracing my ...

Today was my first day back at school, and I have to say, the washrooms are still a disaster. I mean, we pay thousands of rupees in fees, but our washrooms are like a bad joke. Have you seen the state of our girls' washrooms? It's like they're trying to make us cry... or maybe that's just the smell talking. So, our girls' washrooms have these pathetic doors. The locks don't work, and you can't even close the door properly. It's like a game of chance. Will you get the one with the broken lock? Will you get the one with the door that's stuck? Honestly, what is the school staff even thinking? “Hey, let's just leave it broken and hope no one peeks in!” Like, who thought this was a good idea? "Let's not fix the doors, let's just hope the girls can figure it out!" And then there's the water situation. It's like a mythical creature – we've heard of it, but we've never seen it. Is water in the washroom? No, it's a le...