How I Got Scammed By Summer Plans (Spoiler: I Did Not Glow Up)

Summer vacations are like a nice, cool drink after working long hours in the fields, under the scorching, blazing sun. They are our REWARD after months of cramming (useless) knowledge. But I’m talking about the plans we innocently and whole-heartedly form even before the summer begins, those are big, fat scams.

This blog is mostly targeted at myself; someone who can never stick to a “glow-up plan”. Not that I think I need a glow-up, but it’s nice to improve yourself every once in a while—which are supposed to be the two, sacred months of summer vacation. While school was still around, I was giving myself grand pep talks: I’ll be productive in the summer vacation, if not now. As an attempt to distract myself from the guilt of dawdling, which was absolutely shredding my insides.

The vacation rolled around, and I was determined to learn a new language. This ambition lasted for exactly two days, before Duolingo started collecting digital dust on my home-screen. For the record, I do know how to say: “I am pretty” in Arabic, so that covers the goal of learning a new language. Hooray.


I also wanted to improve my vocabulary for the few languages I do happen to speak. The first few days of the summer I did, in fact, learn a few words of English. “Reprimand” and “Chastise”. I’d figured if I’d be in a situation, where someone would be holding me at gunpoint, asking me to name two synonyms of “scold”, fortunately, I’d be able to survive. As you can already guess, I abandoned this goal, soon after I started watching Chinese dramas with English subtitles. I’d get in some English practice from them, right? Besides, any mistake I make in English, could, and would represent my hatred to the English, whose ancestors evilly robbed my homeland of its valuables. You don’t see me holding any grudges, though (Maybe you do).


Anyway, the third goal was to get some exercise. I intentionally discarded the knowledge I gained from the science exam before; I started vigorously exercising the first day, though we definitely did learn in school to not do that as it could lead to injury. Surprise, surprise, I had sore muscles the next day, safe to say I did not hop on the exercise machine the remainder of the holidays. There goes the third goal.


However, I did end up loafing and rotting in bed for 25 hours a day. Which is definitely expected, considering I’m no different than the rest of the universal student community. I bet I’ve probably scrolled half the internet by now. So I think, bringing my highly remarkable wasting-time skills into consideration. That’s why I present the argument: that the plans for summer vacations are a scam, because they (the plans) never allow us to fulfill them. And, that for sure is the fault of the plans, undeniably, not ours.


And the worst feeling is when August kicks in, and you realise you’ve wasted another summer. I guess this is a world-wide student problem, hopefully the scientists can figure out a cure before it’s too late. Until then, I shall bravely continue my mission of scrolling the web and pretending it’s ‘research’.

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